When my life changed drastically, I was eager to hold on to the life I had before. This pattern was hard to break because I had to let go of the things I loved most. What helped me most in detaching were the changes I made in my home to cope with the things I was incapable of. And to get rid of old stuff that wasn’t serving me anymore or I had memories that pulled me back into my old life and habitual thinking patterns. By doing so, I learned to see possibilities when everything seemed impossible. This newly found pattern might become my most excellent gift for now and in the future.
By focusing on possibilities, instead of focusing on my limitations, I experienced breakthroughs. It got me in a more positive state, at least on my good days. I learned new ways of approaching myself in this unique situation. With a shifted awareness, ways to cope crossed my path instead of looking for answers like I did before Covid.
I proceeded to write and create, which gave me the most joy and a feeling of fulfillment and meaning. I seek to inspire people struggling with life questions or chronic illnesses and their caretakers. This feeling of satisfaction I used to find in my work in education, became impossible being ill. Writing and creating are one of the first things I fail in the periods of setbacks when I am too tired, and I also forget about it quickly when I feel better. I have to put it on sticky notes to remember to create something new instead of doing my not-so-daily chores.
I learned that listening to all kinds of music also stimulated my brain. I started listening to music, mainly during the short walks I kept doing because of my PTS. Listening to music outside helped me channel being distracted and overwhelmed by the outside world. I used music to change my state of mind and my mood. By losing a part of me, I lost joy in my life. Changing my mental state using music and movement made a huge difference.
Before my first Covid infection, I started singing lessons, which I had to give up because of my decreased income and the inability to multitask. I needed to remember the text to sing correctly and adjust my mimicry.
Meditation helps me to shift my thoughts. A couple of years ago, I thought meditation was floaty, which wasn’t my thing. During these difficult years, I meditated more often. Now I am aware of my consciousness, which helps me cope and be more creative.